Posted in movies

Heard joke once

Heard joke once:

Man goes to doctor.  Says he’s depressed.  Says life seems harsh and cruel.

Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain.

Doctor says “Treatment is simple.  Great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight.  Go and see him.  That should pick you up.”

Man bursts into tears.

Says “But, doctor…”

“…I am Pagliacci.”

Good joke.

Everybody laugh.

Roll on snare drum.

Curtains.

– Alan Moore, Watchmen.

Posted in movies

The Dark Knight Rises was.. disappointing

* spoilers of course *

I can’t articulate how flat the final part of the The Dark Knight trilogy felt. I certainly didn’t expect the mind blowing performance that Heath Ledger gave.. but this? The whole movie could’ve been helped by a little editing – there are wild time jumps all through the second half that are jarring. (You mean Gotham was under siege for several months?!)

The most cringeworthy part was Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s hilarious take on how he figured out Batman’s identity. I would’ve laughed out loud if I wasn’t dumb-struck by how inane it was.

Also, how predictable was this one compared to the last? It looked like Nolan flipped through a big Movie Book of Cliches and picked up half a dozen at random. For instance, there’s a bit with Bruce Wayne trapped in a pit — it has an opening that can be climbed to give a semblance of hope, but this has almost never been done before. What happens? Wayne tries (and fails/falls) twice to make the big jump that takes him to freedom. Then this token sage tells him some tripe about fear of death and so on, and Mr Wayne takes the jump the next day.. without his rope! And succeeds! Cue a bunch of prisoners cheering, prompting the audience to do so as well. Ugh.

If you ever have the misfortune to break your back, forget mordern medicine, do what Batman does: just give it a good thrust from behind like you’re doing the Heimlich, and hang yourself from the wall until you can stand. If you’re still feeling down, contact your neighbourhood doctor and his philospher friend for a quick morale boost.

Bane’s plan made close to no sense. Instead of bombing the city asap, he drags it on for several months, and why? He wants to give Gothamites a misplaced sense of hope, and then kill them, apparently. The ending was stupid too, and the only reason I didn’t see it coming from a mile of was because I expected better from Nolan. Batman saves the day by dropping a nuke a few miles away (haha), and finally retires? That’s it?

Sure there were good parts. Some of the bits with Alfred, for instance. Catwoman was decent as well. Okay I can’t think of much. A lot of what makes this movie mediocre also holds for the previous one. But Heath Ledger’s performance blinded all the failings of the latter. No such luck here.